Kundalini Splendor

Baba Hari Dass and the Rapture of Raptures

(from "Unmasking the Rose")

Yesterday, I drove to Santa Cruz with my friend Helen to experience satsang with Baba Hari Dass at the Pacific Cultural Center. It has been almost a year since my first encounter with him. But, since Andrew urged me to “associate with spiritual masters,” I felt it was time for a return visit, to see if the magic still held.

The Pacific Cultural Center is a pleasant, church-like building located in a residential section of Santa Cruz. The day was mild, the sun shining. We arrived about an hour early, for the drive down took less time than I had anticipated. I had felt a bit queasy, a little “off” during the drive and wondered if the experience would therefore fall flat.

When we entered the main room, it was still almost empty. I paused to look through some books and literature displayed on a table near the door. As I leafed through one book (which contained many pictures of Baba), I became aware of sweet sensations flowing within. These were a gentle foreshadowing of what was to follow.

The satsang included music (by an instrumental ensemble), chanting (from the Bhagavad Gita), silent meditation, prayer, and answers (written out on his “slate”) by Baba to questions presented by the audience. He also accepted several gifts from children of attendees.
Almost as soon as the Kirtan started, I sensed exquisite energies flowing in my head, and under my skull, as if a flower (I imaged a lotus) were pressing upward. Soon these energies swept downward into my chest and arms. As the music continued, I began to throb with a bliss of a texture unlike any I have before experienced. The feelings grew in intensity until I experienced what seemed to be the Rapture of Raptures, the Ecstasy of Ecstasies. Many times Baba looked at me--sometimes I looked back, when I was able to open my eyes. At times I remember looking up and moving my eyes (which were closed) back and forth or rotating them as sweet waves swept back and forth across and under my skull. At times my heart seemed pierced by excruciating bliss. And sometimes I thought I must lose consciousness, at least immediate awareness of my surroundings.

Once (when I had my eyes closed), I thought I felt Baba’s presence much closer--almost in front of me. I thought perhaps he had sent his spirit from the front of the room to stand before me; then I opened my eyes and saw that Baba was no longer sitting in front of us. He had left the room (temporarily), and had passed quite near me as he exited.

The rapture continued to be extremely intense during the ritual chanting of the Bhagavad Gita. Each syllable, each microsound awakened ever more subtle and refined sensations, fluctuating and pulsing throughout the torso and head, the hands and shoulders, at times even traveling into the sole of the feet. Sometimes I wondered how much I could sustain, but I always seemed to be ready for more.

Once I seemed to communicate telepathically with Baba. When he “asked” (mentally), “What do you want from me?”, I answered (silently), “To love you and be loved by you. To receive help in finding my life direction, and do the thing I am supposed to be doing in this life.”
At times I felt my aura (or energy field) expand far beyond its usual limits. I saw a few images during this experience: A female Indian guru flickered briefly in my “mind’s eye,” and then, to my surprise, Sri Aurobindo. But, even before these, came an image of Christ on the cross (the last image of my original initiation, through Kundalini). This Christ figure was slightly muscular--he was not the languid, soft being we so often encounter. And, once during the experience, I seemed to become Krishna himself, in radiant splendor.

Baba answered several questions (using his slate and an interpreter) after the kirtan and chanting. Most were quite elementary. The askers were young, and had not thought much about spiritual matters. One asked how to get rid of a curse. Baba answered, “I don’t know.” I found this an excellent reply.

Afterward, Helen and I brought lunch from the kitchen and sat down at a table in the larger room to eat. As Baba left, he paused briefly at our table (to give me time to turn and face him). I bowed and smiled--and he did likewise.

What is going on here? Is this the usual experience of one who received shaktipat? Do lots of people feel these vibrations from him? It it in any way personal? Is this a special meeting, or just a guru fishing for followers?

I don’t know. And I really don’t care. Afterwards, I felt that I had been totally ravished. I was overwhelmed.

My Kundalini first awakened May 24, l98l--twelve years ago, almost to the day. Often in past years, intense experiences have occurred on or around this date, as if an anniversary were being celebrated. What a birthday party!

Is it mere coincidence that “my” mantra, a gift of the inner guru (Sri Rama, Rama) is echoed in the name of Baba’s foundation (Sri Rama) for the care of orphans in India?

In any event, why go to Europe to receive the blessing of a saint when one is available so close to home?

And, what, exactly, does Baba Hari Dass mean?

If I were to have a private appointment with him, I think I would ask: “Who are you? And who am I? And have we been together before?”

(image from www.mountmaddona.org)