Kundalini Splendor

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Monday, July 31, 2017

About Near Death Experiences 

About Near Death Experiences

I have a long standing interest in the Near Death Experiences that more people are reporting these days.  A national conference on this topic is being held in Westminster, Colorado, from August 3-August 6.  You can look it up at http://conference.iands.org
Westminster is located between Boulder and Denver.  You can also purchase replays of the presentations from the site.

There are also many videos on Youtube from people who have had such experiences and are describing them here.  One I read recently that I found of special interest is

Dr. Helen Hensley

Her account includes many instances of synchronicity, OOB, and foreseeing future events that have come true.  She is a chiropractor now living in Ireland because of past life connections there. Her then husband freaked out when he saw her leaving her body one night as he slept beside her.  He promptly left the marriage.

Others on Youtube include Nancy Rynes and Eben Alexander.  Nancy got run over by a truck and dragged a few years ago when she was riding her bicycle near Boulder.  She now has a website and has published a book about her experiences.  Eben Alexander is a physician whose experience totally changed his life. He brought back a detailed account of his experiences on the other side.  He has also written book and gives frequent public talks on his journey to elsewhere.

The common theme of these narrations is the need for love for self and others plus the importance of society to become more focused on our spiritual essence rather than material possessions.  I myself believe that the sense of unconditional love that many report is deeply akin to the loving connection to the divine that Kundalini can bring when we are in right alignment.  Both are life changing events, for certain.  For me, the essence of Kundalini is bliss itself, the hallmark of the presence of the Beloved Within.  This is a palpable, somatic experience, and compares, I believe, with any experience of rapture that a human lover can bring.  We are told in the ancient texts that our divine nature is "satchitananda."  (being/consciousness/bliss).  The "bliss" that is referred to is the sweet ecstasy that streams through the body when Kundalini is fully activated and integrated into the system.  This bliss is also the final stage of the mystic journey, when the self is annihilated into the ultimate.

NDE's are now rather well known as are out of body accounts.  Kundalini, however, is somehow less known by the general public, although there are many sites on the internet purporting to be about this topic.  In fact, you can read almost any and everything about this subject, but I think you have to be very discriminating about these posts.

As much as I feel that the schedule of the NDE conference is full of interesting topics and speakers on various related subjects, I am disappointed that nowhere is there any direct acknowledgement of the role of Kundalini in human evolution.  For me, Kundalini is the ultimate key to our progress in becoming divine beings, or "divinized matter."

Sunday, July 30, 2017

Invocation to Kundalini 

Invocation to Kundalini

Oh, Mother of all mothers,
Goddess of all the gods,
hold us tightly
in your embrace.

Let what was unknown
become known,
what was hidden
come into light.

This is our time
to come together,
to be infused
with your divine energies,
to know that we are
yours, eternally,
even now
as we move ahead
into the vast unknown,
drown us in the sea of love.

Dorothy Walters
July 23, 2017

Saturday, July 29, 2017



I have abandoned theories and
They rattle through my mind
like hail on roofs made of tin.
The controversies
and the discussions,
the explanations
and the explications––
they have nothing to do
with who I am.

What I want is this kiss
the rose is offering just now,
this opening into
more than I can tell.
This silent knowing,
this feeling rising and falling
like waves against the shores
of my unnamed self,
my only reality
that I cannot capture
in any net of words
nor contain in any

Dorothy Walters
July 29, 2017

Friday, July 28, 2017

About Kundalini––poem by Dorothy 

About Kundalini

Like any lover,
you can be wild
or soft.

You can arrive
like a tornado
roaring across
the plains,
the funnel your forewarning.

Then Shiva dances
in your body,
your flesh
in delight and you wonder
how much joy you can withstand,
whether you will survive.

Again, you may arrive
like Buddha facing
his disciples,
holding up the flower in silence,
as if to proclaim,
"See, here it is,
the revelation you are seeking,
the final truth that lives everywhere."

But if the disciple is not ready,
there are difficulties,
then only chaos and confusion ensue
and nothing can be learned.

Dorothy Walters
July 26, 2017

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Kundalini: Preparations and Arrival 

Kundalini: Preparations and Arrival

A question that often arises is : how can my awakening occur?  Some suggest that you must follow a discipline, believe in an as yet unseen reality, and above all commit to the notion that "God" is in fact unlimited ecstasy and that you will partake of this ecstasy (bliss, rapture) if you simply do all the prescribed practices, perhaps even practice the austerities, purity your diet, visit your therapist, and in all ways seek divine connection.

But the truth is somewhat different.  The path to heaven is not a ladder with fixed stages that you attain one by one until you are rewarded at the end with a final confirmation, rapture passing description.  Even if you enter an ashram, meditate and say your mantra countless hours each day, spend time reading the scriptures or attending ceremonies,
there is no guarantee that you will succeed in your goal.  This journey is not a process that takes you to some final culmination.  It is not like studying a foreign language with the expectation that you will eventually become fluent in that tongue.  Indeed, you can practice your piano many  hours daily, and, although you will improve, you will not become Mozart.  Some other ingredient, some indefinable factor is required beyond discipline and adherence to prescribed techniques.

This element is divine grace.  It may come after years of devotion or it may spring upon you suddenly, like a panther seizing its prey.  When it erupts, you may not even fully realize what is happening nor even have words to name or describe it.

What then, is one to do, since nothing is guaranteed on this path, no final rewards are certain?  The key is to prepare without expectation, to move ahead toward an uncertain destination, to ask for the goddess' blessing on the journey, and be satisfied with whatever results.  We are each at a unique place on the path of ascension.  Know that where you are is in fact appropriate for you at this stage.  It is often said that "the path is the goal."  Know that these words are true and strive for progress, not arrival.

Yeats spoke of "making your soul."  This is your task always––to create a self that is better, more in touch with that which is compassionate and caring, to use your gifts to make the world a better place in all ways.  And to open to love deep within your heart, so that you may in turn give and receive love from others in a sacred manner.

Then who knows what may ensue in your life, what may happen to you as constant blessings unfold?

Dorothy Walters
July 26, 2017

Wednesday, July 26, 2017

Kundalini Speaks 

Kundalini Speaks

Yes, I was the music
of your body.
I was the unstruck sound,
the holy syllable
of your soul.

I floated through you
like one cloud
sharing its gold
with another.

I touched you in
the secret places
that only true lovers

I awakened your heart
to what you had
no name for.

Was it the music of the spheres
toned down so that you
could listen?
My soft vibrations
wafted through you
like the aftertones
of a chant
reverberating in
the rafters  of a cathedral.

Dorothy Walters
July 26, 2017

Dorothy Walters
July 26, 2017

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

Advice for the Journey 

Advice for the Journey

Often Kundalini Awakening is very much an up and down process, one day feeling superb, the next disturbed and even ill.  Think of waves that rise and fall, your own physical energies that come and go, music that contains both crescendos and diminuendos.

If you feel some kind of discomfort or illness happening:

Calm it down however you can.  Breathing, warm baths, walks in nature, soothing your aura by stroking it or massaging the body wherever it hurts.  Slow deep breathing with mantra of "calm, calm, calm."  Mudras if you like these.  Tai chi, yoga, chi gong, free movement imitating the set forms.  Stretching exercises.  Free movement dancing. Soft music, gentle movement––know this temporary discomfort is a part of process.  Don't panic.  Part of continuing process of integration, learning to deal with the new energies.  Allow the sweetness to flow, if it wishes.

Spiritual poetry, visual images, music.  Kirtan, Tibetan overtone chanting, whatever appeals to you from jazz to classical (rap is more difficult for many of us, but perhaps it does serve as an outlet for pent up feelings of anger and distress).

Your own creative outlet (music, art, poetry, writing).

Helping someone in some way.

Thinking of someone you love.

Prayer for those in need and for the world.

Ask to be shown your proper path and how best to give your gifts to the world.

Actions including political to make the world better.

Find a friend, a spiritual buddy who is sympathetic and understanding to share with.  If you don't have such a person in your life, keep a journal and let your feelings and thoughts flow freely.  Often, you can find like minded friends on Facebook.

Listen to authentic spiritual teachers on YouTube or on Webinar presentations.

The company of healing, nurturant persons.

Keep you physical body in the best shape you can.  Diet, exercise, moderation in alcohol, cut cigarettes and caffeine, as much sleep as you need––familiar rules for good health.  This is your vessel.  Honor it.

Find the practice best suited for you––quiet meditation, movement either slow or fast,
above all, sensing the energetic flow within.

Seek good companions, like minded souls.  Groups in harmony where energies become coherent.

Gratitude for gifts in your life.  Sympathy for those who suffer from illness, personal loss, displacement as refugees.

New experiences, such as classes, workshops, articles and spiritual sites online, new forms of healing (massage, energetic balancing, novel approaches through emerging techniques involving both light and sound).

Reflect on possible underlying issues in your life that might be causing these symptoms of psychological or physical distress.  Get good professional help from a psychotherapist who understands the transformation process.

Know that this process is not one of a step by step progression to a fixed goal.  It is an experience of constant unfolding, staying open to your own inner expansion of consciousness, always maintaining your connection to Source, knowing that the entire planetary transformation is in fact being orchestrated elsewhere and that we are each progressing in the way best suited for us.

Know that you are not alone and that you are part of a worldwide process into the next stage of human evolution (the divine human).

Know that you are loved.

Watch out for phonies.

And don't forget the bliss.

Monday, July 24, 2017

A Random Act of Kindness 

A Random Act of Kindness

Today I walked over to a nearby deli to pick up a sandwich and salad for lunch.  The place I go to is a favorite of young people as well as those who seem to be more working types.  Sometimes I feel a bit out of place there as an older woman who definitely does not "fit in" with the crowd.

As I was getting ready to pay, a young man (about 22-or 23) stepped up and announced that he was paying for my lunch.  I looked at him for a minute. He was wearing ragged jeans (apparently the style these days) and also a rumpled tee shirt.  When I protested, he insisted and said, "My mother taught me well."  So I agreed and told him to give her my thanks and also a hug from me.  Then as I walked over to pick up my order, the even younger fellow behind the counter said he had overheard the exchange and added, "Yes, there are still people like this in the world."

I was a bit overwhelmed by all of this.  Indeed, kindness is the answer.  And this episode was a lovely reminder that indeed it does exist in our world, amidst all the chaos and confusion.

Sunday, July 23, 2017

What Happens––poem by Dorothy 

What Happens

You know what happens.
Reach a certain age
and everything runs
a bundle of memories
racing down hill
to an unseen

The children down the street
who "whipped you with blankets"
when you were six,
the teacher who inspired you at sixteen
and set your course,
the time you got first place
in the essay contest,
the day in the forest
with your new lover,

All blended and merged
like a painting
that never quite dried,
like an antique book of photos,
reminding you
of who you once were,
what you then became.

Dorothy Walters
July 18, 2017

Saturday, July 22, 2017

What If?––poem by Dorothy 

What If?

What if this were
your last moment here
on this place we call earth?

What if this were
your final breath?

If your candle went out now,
how would that be?
Would you have things
to think about or regret,
hear the inner music.
die into love?

Who determines
these things?
Makes them happen?

Is your future peaceful
or sad?

Another stage is waiting.
How will it be with
you then
when you go there?

Dorothy Walters
July 23, 2017

Replay of Andrew Harvey on Discovering the Way of the Beloved  

This morning Andrew Harvey gave stunning talk on "Discovering the Sufi Way of the Beloved: Ecstasy and Surrender Through the Mystical Teachings of Sufism."  Now this talk is available as a replay on Tuesday, July 25 at noon Pacific time.  The replay is free.  It is the best bargain you will ever encounter.  It is a rare opportunity to listen to a deep mystic/scholar speak on a topic we all desperately need at this time in our lives.  Joseph Cambell said "Follow your bliss."  This is how you do it!
As for me, I felt a transmission of bliss even as he spoke this morning.  Maybe you will also.

The Shift Network

Rumi has written that love is the water of life.

We really can’t live without love, and most of us would agree that the world would be a better place if we all could get better at giving and receiving it.

Renowned mystic-scholar Andrew Harvey spoke about the Sufi way of opening to love –– an ecstatic, passionate love connection with the Divine and all of life –- in his electric virtual event this morning, Discovering the Sufi Way of the Beloved: Ecstasy & Surrender Through the Mystical Teachings of Sufism.

This was frankly the most dynamic transmission of heart-wisdom I’ve heard in awhile, one that unraveled so many misconceptions (have you ever thought of the Prophet Mohammed as a feminist for instance?)!

If you missed it, there are instructions below on how to listen in in a few days...

One of the things I particularly appreciate about Andrew’s teachings is how he illuminates the Sufi path as a way to unravel false notions of our Self and truly die into love.

Andrew shows us that by diving into the depths of our hearts, we can see the Beloved in the eyes of all who cross our path.

He speaks in an impassioned way about the universality of truth, love, and wisdom at the core of Sufism –– which not only inspires us to open our hearts more deeply, but can also creates societies that have a sacred design.

He shared how Mohammed, for instance, was the only founder of a major religion who was involved in all the complexity of daily life, from having a family to creating laws. He thus showed how Sufism marries an ecstatic and transcendent grace with feet-on-the-ground practicality.

If you missed this truly sizzling, heart-expanding hour with Andrew, you’ll get another chance to listen in this Tuesday, July 25, at noon Pacific, during a special encore.

You can access this FREE virtual event here:
Discovering the Sufi Way of the Beloved

Andrew particularly shared how all seekers can benefit from an exploration of the Sufi path, as it is known for taking us to the deepest, most viscerally experienced connection with the Beloved.

It’s a journey to the inner chambers of your heart, the truth of your soul and the ultimate love connection –– the deepest, most ecstatic union with the Beloved, one in which you do not seek, but surrender…

You’ve undoubtedly experienced inklings of this bliss, this shimmering of oneness, reading the poems of Sufi mystics, such as Rumi and Hafiz.

That’s why we’re excited that Andrew will be teaching an entire
10-week program on this subject, The Sufi Way of the Beloved Opening to Ecstasy, Fearlessness & Compassion Through the Wisdom of 7 Great Mystics, in a couple of weeks.

In this revelatory, heart-opening program, he’ll take you on an exploration of seven Sufi mystics, sharing their stories, poetry and realizations to help you walk the path of embodied divinity.

Through his deep insights, scholarship, and storytelling, you’ll discover a new understanding of the importance of this mystical lineage and the role it can play in liberating you into a more devotional relationship with life.


Discover a practice of burning in the heart for the Beloved
Recognize the centrality of the Divine Feminine in Sufism
Understand the true meaning of surrender
Learn the core Sufi practice of remembrance that enables you to stay aligned with the Beloved
Understand the role of extreme suffering in extreme transformation
Develop a deeper appreciation of the Prophet Mohammed’s teachings and stories
See how integrating divine intelligence into how we design society can unite our spiritual ideals with societal principles
Celebrate the Sufi quest for a more universal understanding that embraces all paths
If we are to create true peace between world religions and throughout the world, we need to understand the depths of the Sufi way and its luminous gifts to the world –– especially those expressed by the many Sufi teachers and masters who offer us the most accessible teachings.

You can find out more about The Sufi Way of the Beloved 7-week program here.

We hope you join us Tuesday for the special encore of Andrew’s introduction to this powerful program.

We’re certain you’ll be inspired to look at where you need to open your heart more fully –– and follow the way of the Sufi –– from compassionately illuminating and liberating your own shadow to seeing the world through the eyes of the Beloved.

This is a beautiful opportunity…

Stephen Dinan - The Shift Network
With love,

Stephen Dinan

P.S. Andrew is well-schooled in all the major religious traditions, but he has a particularly profound relationship with Sufism. Through his deep insights, scholarship and storytelling, you’ll open a door to a new understanding of the importance of this mystical lineage.

Remember to mark your calendar for this Tuesday’s FREE encore presentation of Discovering the Sufi Way of the Beloved. This remarkable hour with Andrew starts at 5:00pm, Pacific.

Again, for your convenience, you can access this complimentary call here:
Discovering the Sufi Way of the Beloved

Pin  862166 #

Thursday, July 20, 2017

A Weft and Warp––poem by Dorothy 

A Weft and Warp

Rumi tells us we are nothing more
than this weft and warp of bones and muscle
until we are able to see.

Think of it!
We go about supposing
we are merely
this fingernail
this eyelash,
a bag of tendons, veins
and fat.

Then one day
something happens,
and we know
we have been walking about
as a human mirage,
a breathing phantasm.

It is this,
this Other,
now stirring within,
the Guest entering the house,
the lost Lover returned,
the reality of It and us,
all one.

Dorothy Walters
July 20,  2017

(image from internet;
Rumi quote from Mathani 211)

Wednesday, July 19, 2017

Video of Syrian refugee dancer––Beautiful! 

Here is a beautiful video from Fusion of a dancer from Syria who escaped and now uses his talent to promote peace.  It will take your breath away!

Fusion added a new video: Refugee Defies ISIS With Ballet.Like Page
July 9 at 7:00am ·
"[ISIS] would burn dancers...they would call me to threaten me."

Ahmad Joudeh's life was threatened in Syria simply because he was a dancer––now he uses dance as a message for peace:

View on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vw-kZABueC4

Andrew Harvey––Free Event: the Sufi Way of the Beloved 

Andrew Harvey––Free event on Sufism

The Shift Network

I feel deeply committed to discovering the sacred gifts in every major spiritual lineage.

That’s part of why I’m excited by the Sufi mystics who hold important keys to the ecstatic surrender into true love.

There’s a reason why Rumi, one of the most important Sufi mystics, is the most beloved poet in America. It comes down to one word: love.

Andrew Harvey, mystic, scholar, founder of the Institute of Sacred Activism, deeply believes that the “Sufi Way of the Beloved” holds the key to an ecstatic experience of love… and just may hold the key to create true and lasting peace in the world.

This week, he will deliver you into the heart of Sufism to receive the blessing — and experience the initiatory power — of this ancient sacred lineage during a free event called: Discovering the Sufi Way of the the Beloved: Ecstasy & Surender Through the Mystical Teachings of Sufism.

You can reserve your free seat here:

Discovering the Sufi Way of the the Beloved

If you’ve ever been curious about the noble and tender power of the Sufi path, Andrew Harvey is an ideal guide who can bring it vividly to life. He’s not only a scholar of many major faiths, he’s been a long-time student, translator and initiate of Sufi lineages.

The Sufis grew to have a deeply devotional relationship with the Divine, which results in a more ecstatic path.

In this free event,you’ll experience this path as you:

Understand the true meaning of surrender
Discover that the authentic “jihad” is the inner annihilation of the false self
Develop a deeper appreciation of the Prophet Mohammed
Recognize the centrality of the divine feminine to Sufism
See how integrating divine intelligence into how we design society can unite our spiritual ideals with societal principles
Celebrate the Sufi quest for a more universal understanding that embraces all paths
Not only will you shift your understanding of Sufism and discover the heart of this profound lineage, you’ll gain a transformed understanding of misunderstood Islamic concepts such as “jihad” (hint: it’s not about war).

Andrew has a way of opening new gateways of possibility that allow us to become the divine humans we are meant to be. By revealing the sacred core of Sufism while at the same time celebrating other wisdom traditions, he helps us build stronger bridges between major faiths.

The event is free to attend and you will receive a recording if you can’t listen live: Discovering the Sufi Way of the the Beloved

There’s really no one who is more eloquent and impassioned on the REAL mystical path than Andrew. He’s a pure delight to listen to.

Stephen Dinan - The Shift Network

Stephen Dinan

P.S. During Discovering the Sufi Way of the Beloved, Andrew will help you open to the sublime love at the core of the Sufi path and discover teachings and practices that can liberate your soul through a profoundly intimate relationship with the Divine.

Register for free here: Discovering the Sufi Way of the the Beloved


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Tuesday, July 18, 2017

John O'Donohue––A Morning Offering 

A Morning Offering

I bless the night that nourished my heart
To set the ghosts of longing free
Into the flow and figure of dream
That went to harvest from the dark
Bread for the hunger no one sees.

All that is eternal in me
Welcomes the wonder of this day,
The field of brightness it creates
Offering time for each thing
To arise and illuminate.

I place on the altar of dawn:
The quiet loyalty of breath,
The tent of thought where I shelter,
Wave of desire I am shore to
And all beauty drawn to the eye.

May my mind come alive today
To the invisible geography
That invites me to new frontiers,
To break the dead shell of yesterdays,
To risk being disturbed and changed.

May I have the courage today
To live the life that I would love,
To postpone my dream no longer
But do at last what I came here for
And waste my heart on fear no more.

- John O'Donohue

Sunday, July 16, 2017

The Discovery––poem by Dorothy 

The Discovery

The Discovery

When it came,
it was not what I

There were no heavenly
no angels hovering

I had not made my
way to this place
by thinking
more and more complex
mastering convoluted theories.

There was not a face,
no name,
no secret formulas.

It was rather
a feeling,
a sense
in my body
as of a thousand
rose petals
in every pore,
each a center of
holy delight.

It rose upward
in a flash,
and then
at the ultimate
when the divine
poured in
all thinking
ceased completely
and I knew that I
and "it" were one,
only this was real,
a final revelation.

Dorothy Walters
July 16, 2017

Saturday, July 15, 2017

Mary Oliver––What Is There Beyond Knowing? 

What is There Beyond Knowing?

Mary Oliver

What is there beyond knowing that keeps

calling to me? I can't

turn in any direction
but it's there. I don't mean

the leaves' grip and shine or even the thrush's
silk song, but the far-off

fires, for example,
of the stars, heaven's slowly turning

theater of light, or the wind
playful with its breath;

or time that's always rushing forward,
or standing still

in the same—what shall I say—

What I know
I could put into a pack

as if it were bread and cheese, and carry it
on one shoulder,

important and honorable, but so small!
While everything else continues, unexplained

and unexplainable.  How wonderful it is
to follow a thought quietly

to its logical end.
I have done this a few times.

But mostly I just stand in the dark field,
in the middle of the world, breathing

in and out. Life so far doesn't have any other name
but breath and light, wind and rain.

If there's a temple, I haven't found it yet.
I simply go on drifting, in the heaven of the grass
and the weeds.

~ from New and Selected Poems, volume two (Beacon Press, 2005)

Friday, July 14, 2017

Lilla Botlik––Sex and Spirituality  

Lilla Marta Botlik

Sex - the most sacred of spiritual energies

Based on my initial experience and the ongoing transformational process, I regard sexual energy, the primordial force of creation itself as pure consciousness. From its bound expression in form it seeks expansion, it likes to escape like a genie from a bottle to experience union with its own boundlessness and oneness.

So whether it is rapture, physical orgasm, non-physical orgasm, bliss, heart expansion or expanded consciousness, you name it, there's no distinction, or goal per se, but simply the movement of consciousness in whatever flavour it has decided to expand and where in the body it manifests from.

In the lower chakras it's firey, in the heart it's airy, in the head it's rarified and inifinite. Sometimes it's all of that at the same time. It's up to Mother and I let Her do it. Often, She plays me like a piano up and down, other times it's the heart that is in rapture or Her Abode, as I call it, the sexual organs. Or Her Womb, the infinite ocean She takes my speck of consciousness to.

Whether there are physical outer or inner orgasms, full-body or beyond orgasms or ecstasy where one cannot even move it doesn't matter, It's all Her, pure Consciousness and by default Her seat is in the physical body, in the reproductive organs through which She creates all life.

That's why the sexual urge is the strongest force in our body, far stronger than that of the heart or spiritual seeking because all these are derived from our libido. The primal urge of sexual union is the impulse of infinite consciousness to expand and create new form.
To deny it or regard it as something inferior is the biggest sacrilege. Sexual energy and sexuality itself are the most sacred of all divine expressions as it is the highest sacrifice that consciousness makes when it transforms itself into matter, from non-form into form. In Kabbalah, it is Yesod; the Foundation upon which God has built the world.

To renounce it immaturely because it is inconvenient or because one is so spiritual that they don't need to work with it, or to escape it because it's challenging; is really saying no to the true embodiment of divinity. As awakening takes place, the body and sexuality become the very vehicles for the transformation from base metal to gold meaning to be able to house new levels of consciousness that is the Soul.

There is no other way but to embrace it and treat it with due respect and awe as the divine power itself in manifestation.

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Nan Merrill––The Awakening Journey 

The Awakening Journey

Awakening is an ongoing journey.  To begin to see and to turn our lives around is only the beginning.  As an act of the soul, we are called to take a long, loving and sometimes painful look at who we are and whom we have been.  This road humbles us and gives us the strength to change the direction in which we are headed, to ask forgiveness, to simplify and discard all that is not Life-giving, and to abandon ourselves into Love’s hands.  Inasmuch as we are able to say yes, we are blessed with new life, peace, new joy, new love .. and freedom.

Only slowly have I learned to make this journey with a bit of grace.  For years I fought the process, stumbled and fell, rebelled and strayed, regressed, and betrayed my inner being—and yet, always the gifts of forgiveness, strength, courage, guidance and unconditional love have been given whenever i have had the humility to ask, to listen for the Voice of Wisdom and to respond.

Journey into Love
From Fear to Freedom
Nan Merrill

I knew Nan slightly through a mutual friend. She was a remarkable woman, with great wisdom and deep insight into the spiritual journey.  She wrote many books on spiritual matters.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Lilla Botlik––Her Awakening Experience––Part 2 (final) 

Lilla Botlik––Her Awakening Experience––Part 2 (final)
(from her blog at "Wonderfulkundalini.blogspot.com)

I literally came to existence from non-existence there and then and instantly reconised Her as my real Mother and said oh, it's You, Mother, Mother Universe. And I fell in love with Her. She gave me birth then. I'm Her child. Since then, this theme is ongoing, the transformation is becoming and being Her child, I didn't know how universal, encompassing and present in all religions and even in transpersonal psychology was what happened to me. A few weeks later I watched the Inner Worlds, Outer Worlds documentary movie from Canadian filmmaker Daniel Schmidt and found out about Her as Kundalini Shakti (upward current) and Universal Consciousness as Grace, Holy Spirit or Shiva (downward current). Thus, East and West were reconciled as complementary to each other and unified.

The amount of Love, tenderness, consolation and support she gives day and night is enormous. And correction, if needed. My life has completely changed I became single. From about 10 month into the Awakening She started teaching me how to manage and offer my sexual energy to Her so that She can do the transformative processes of the body-mind-heart. I later found out this is called Tantra. I have no formal training either in yoga or meditation. Again, she led me to the Prayer of the Heart and Sufi heart meditation which I practiced daily for two years 2015 and 2016.

The results were some wild and beautiful, heart-wrenching and heart-expanding experiences. There are a lot of spontaneous movements and inner movements almost all the time but especially when I think of Her, which is mostly all of the time. :) I feel tension building then just let the contorsions, heaving, crying, groans and sighs occur then oh, the bliss and the love come. So strongly sometimes that it infuses the body into a seeming paralysis...

At the same time, I knew I had to face the now reunited split-off self which I avoided for decades. I was so afraid of the pain I thought that would break my heart so definitely, I wouldn't survive. And when She called, I went in to meet that blessed child, with a bit of fear but She was with me...That took me some two years of constant work to let go of the pain but nothing compares to the beauty of that inner work and the wonderful healing which is felt each time and at the end makes unconditional love, bliss and extasy a permanent feature in one's life.

I haven't yet had a Guru or Master apart from Her, the biggest Guru. As Her Presence and teachings are felt all the time, I spend most of my time in extatic or silent devotion or working with the subconsious as a kind of a background process. After a year-long break, I have a full time job and I'm raising my young child. This fits in perfectly with my life. She is Everything to me. She makes all the decisions. She literally spring-cleans the body, subconscious and heart all the time and educates me so it's like a continuous practice without actually doing anything it seems. I always want to learn from Her but mostly being in Her Embrace like a child.

The separate, split-self fused in the instant of the upward movement of the awakening and a sense of selves which the brain hallucinates also shattered into a million pieces one mid-October morning last year. There was a final sweep of the shards of the selves some ten days later in an indescribable cosmic dance of happiness where all the atoms of my body and of the Universe were dancing in bliss. These events took some six months of adjustment for the brain. After a 6-month-long innocent and childlike no-self state one night She jolted me out of it and now it looks like She wants me to come out of this cocoon and share the beginnings of my journey.

I'm still a baby. In the past three years I was pretty much alone with this but felt ever so increasingly happy, balanced and healed. I know it's early days for me to say anything... What I do know, and I may be in the minority that Kundalini and Grace are just so extatic and gentle, loving, heart-opening and so so so positive that I cannot even begin to describe it. What about those not-so-pleasant symptoms people talk about? I know how the heart aches when it opens and when Beloved Mother opens up the subconscious it's not easy to see and feel what's in it. When you go in, even with trepidation, it's already the healing that's taking place.

From my experience I see that the key factors for a blissful and extatic Kundalini activation / awakening and its enfoldment are:

- forgiveness
- openness
- tolerance, compassion, love towards all life and all living beings
- childlike wonder and innocence
- loving and devotional attitude
- total surrender
- unconditional trust

These traits are our true nature we never lost. It's just waiting for us to realize that.

Blessings to you and wish you all a wonderful seeking / awakening / transformation!

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Lilla Botlik––Her Kundalini Awakening––Part 1 

Lilla Botlik  was born in Hungary but left in her early twenties to move to the UK.  She now lives in Provence, France, and is an IT specialist by profession.   She has graciously offered to let me reprint this account of her beautiful awakening experience.  She is very fortunate in that her transformative journey has been one characterized mainly with ecstasy rather than pain.  This entry is taken from her own blog site at WonderfulKundalini.blogsite.com  She also has a FB page, but her writings on both sites are currently mainly in Hungarian, though she plans to translate them into English in future.  This account is from her blog under the heading "Touch of Grace."  I am reprinting it here just as she has written it without trying to change any typos or occasional misspellings  or other minor errors, for I want it to appear in her own voice.

Our Beloved Kundalini Mother awakened in my body in spring 2014. I was 39. Spontaneously, without having heard about Kundalini or seeking it. Six months prior to the event, I had an urge to make a clean slate. To forgive all hurt and everyone in my life. Which I did. It diddn't matter any more, I felt something was pushing me to let go although I didn't know what. Growing up and just being a human was not easy for me. A separation from my twin sister at the age of 9 due to parental divorce caused me a split of self, PTSD and anxiety - depression, all undiagnosed until I was 30. I felt that I was forever separated from my own self, therefore from everybody else on a deeper level, including my intimate partners. Therefore I was separate from the Universe. 

I felt this separation always. I believed this would never change. I lived a successful life, learned languages, worked in differenct countries in languages and in IT. Things were going well on the outside. A friendly, helpful, kind person. Inside, it was pain, pain, pain and utter despair. I was to smile, or die - I thought. I had continuous suicidal thoughts, at times suicide attempts, general self-hate and the "I do not want to be here" feeling. I was on Prozac on and off for 12 years even before the official diagnosis.

Being very curious from a young age, I was fascinated by the universe and from the age of 12 my quest was to know it. In my teens it was religion then when I abandoned that, I went straight to quantum physics. I was open to everything but as an agnostic. I felt the most honest thing is that I don't know, I cannot know from a limited consciousness and limited senses the Universe at large. Still there was always a childlike wonder at the Universe and how beautiful it is and how it functions, the complexity, the surprises science have about it and the endlessness of it.

Then three months prior to the awakening, the "trances" came immediately after I started listening to a short guided meditation before going to sleep. I had no reference points. I called them trances as I learned a very simple self-hypnosis technique back in 2007 in London from Valerie Austin to help me go to sleep by going into a light trance. Most times, I could only fall aslped if I repeated 'Mom' and thought of my mother as she was the only one who could console me all my life when I was in distress.The trances became deeper.and deeper, even in dayligt, spontaneously or just getting into the mood of it. It was a light that started expanding and enveloped my whole being and often the room and beyond. It had a very relaxing and loving presence. 

The first time I sensed the loving light and presence I asked, why I am here? The answer was: to see and to heal. I thought it was the subconscious that answered. I became happier and happier, started embracing everyone, then all living beings and started to fall in love with something not knowing what. The bliss intensified often culminating in the feeling of floating in the air or flying, extasy, inner orgasm in pelvic area which rose to the heart. I dived in all this. Like a child. Unknowingly, with complete trust. There was never a question raised or wanting to find out what this was. As it was something I never experienced before. It was all I ever dreamed of but thought I could never feel that. 

Without knowing what it was, Grace came one afternoon as I was sitting in my car waiting for my aqua-gym class to start. The Infinite was in my head and said: Closer and pulled me towards It. It was infinitely strong and infinitely tender at once. Then I knew that All is One. Not intellectually but in reality, I became That and everything was THAT. The One, Then it moved to my heart and I felt what Oneness was. Words cannot describe it. Then it moved downwards to my sexual organs and the body physically became ONE with the ONE. Then I felt something move in my genitals.

As it moved, the whole Universe moved with it. It rose up in waves and ondulating movements in my belly, blowing huge energies into each chakra with each feeling like cosmis orgasm and extasy. Then when it arrived in the head, the head exploded everywhere in the universe and the energy in the form of a tornado and with a similar force blew through the fontanelle and exited into the Universe when all of my being and the Universe became one. I was simultaneously conscious of the body and everything else in the universe. It felt infinitely free oh so pure. It was a sort of "I am" everything without the "I", like pure existence, beingness.

The whole event lasted about 15 - 20 minutes. The only thing I knew was that something very transcendental happened. I was in utter love and bliss. I vibrated for a week so much that I became exhausted and after driving home from work I lay on the bed on my stomach and I said: "I don't know what this is, do what you want", then Shakti, the Divine Mother manifested at this instant, the Cosmic Womb, Unisersal Mother as an infinite womb everywhere which looked like wafts of velvety clouds of galaxies in pinks - oranges - purples very much resembling photos of a woman's womb where the baby is growing. I was a baby in that Womb seeing all that and looking down at my belly I noticed a huge, greyish umbilical cord going from under my belly button into Her, the Infinite Cosmos. 

Monday, July 10, 2017

Brahma is Atman, Atman is Brahma 

Brahma is Atman, Atman is Brahma

When I was a child of about eleven, our class read a book containing a short description of Eastern thought and there I read the sentence: "Brahma is Atman, Atman is Brahma."
Of course, I knee nothing of Eastern thought or philosophy at that young age.  We were told that "Atman" is the individual self and "Brahma" is God.  When I read this description I immediately thought, "Well, of course, that is obvious."

Some people, hearing such assertions, take it as an act of pride to think that one is God.  But of course, what that declaration means is that one is "God" only in the same way a droplet is an indistinguishable part of the ocean or how a cell or corpuscle in your body is, in some hidden way, part of who you are.  Hallaj, a Sufi mystic who lived from 858-922 CE, was executed, perhaps for his heretical views, though some think he was sentenced  for political reasons.   He proclaimed publicly: "There is nothing wrapped in my turban but God, " and similarly he would point to his cloak and say, ما في جبتي إلا الله "Mā fī jubbatī illā l-Lāh 'There is nothing in my cloak but God.'" He also wrote:

I saw my Lord with the eye of the heart'
I asked, ‘Who are You?’
He replied, ‘You’."

Many words and interpretations have been offered as to the true meaning of the notion that God and self are the same.  Some are highly sophisticated and complex.  But I believe what is meant  is that your own soul or spirit is one with Source, that your own identity derives from a divine reality, known by various names throughout the world.  Mystics have known this from time immemorial.  Tolstoy said, "The kingdom of God is within you" and this knowledge is what the mystics realize when they awaken to the truth of their inner being.

And Kundalini awakening, when it involves the opening of the heart or the crown chakra in a state of rapture, reinforces the truth of this conviction.  Too often, this awareness is buried deep in the subconscious mind until such recognition is somehow brought to the surface.  As far as I am concerned, this state of divine union is the closest we can come to God in this human condition.  In these moments, we no longer have to struggle with whether we agree or disagree with some idea or notion.  We literally feel God moving through out bodies as unconditional love.  Indeed, we constantly strive to become the divine human so many have talked about.  Kundalini is the means by which we progress.

(Quotation from Wikipedia)

Sunday, July 09, 2017

Dakinis and Humans 

The passage below from Passionate Enlightenment: Women in Tantric Buddhism by Miranda Shaw, who is familiar with The Tantric Dance of Feminine Power, describes the dance transmissions of healing and empowerment that adepts can provide through The Dance:

“As described in ancient texts, female divinities (termed yogini, dakini, matrka) are invoked […] and bodied forth by human women, who dance in an ecstatic state of trance-identification. The yoginis undergo transfiguration before all present, taking on an appearance and movements of their divine counterparts. The enraptured women, ornamented as dieties, flushed with dancing, and glowing with heightened awareness, could then receive worship, bestow blessings, and confer magical powers.”    

Saturday, July 08, 2017

Whatever Happens 

Whatever Happens

Wherever you are, I am there.
Wherever I go, you are with me.

After I met you,
I lost all my attributes.
My attachments,
my longings,
my prizes and decorations.

I cannot remember
what it was that I desired before,
how I found interest
in the world.

Whatever happens,
do not leave me,
for then I would have
be nothing,
merely a blank canvas
waiting to be filled.

Dorothy Walters
July 7, 2017

Friday, July 07, 2017

Forest Music 

Forest Music

I am an awareness
resting on a tree of bone.

Music sings to me,
as the birds come
and go.

Lightning has struck me
yet I still flower,
I bloom, I bloom.

In the forest,
the trees whisper
to one other,
waiting for
the lightning
to come again.

Dorothy Walters
July 7, 2017

Thursday, July 06, 2017

Praying––Penny Hackert Evans 


Penny Hackert Evans

 Today I found
a round green prayer
hanging under the serrated leaf
of a tomato plant.

Then the purple clematis
shouted “Amen”
as they closed up
for the season.

The scent of lemon in iced tea
had a saintly sort of feel.

And surely the ribboned garter snake
prayed quickly as he escaped
my watering hose.

The setting orange sun
is praying for the rising moon.

And me?  I’m just sitting here
in my backyard sanctuary,
wondering if I should
get down on my knees.

Wednesday, July 05, 2017

How They Worship 

How They Worship

Some drink only the sacred wine,
eat ritual bread
amidst the incense,
taking God
into their body.

Others shout
and roll on the floor,
speak in strange syllables,
crying out to the named god
in frenzied devotion.

And still others sit primly,
listening while another speaks,
never moving or
stirring about,
God through the ears.

Where is this One
you have never seen,
who whispers to you
deep secrets
of your being?

Only in your heart
will you discover his dwelling,
dancer who is half man,
half woman,
the flaming One
who will enter, join with you,
ignite your holy love.

Dorothy Walters
July 4, 2017

Note:  I have been reading certain ancient poetry and was inspired to write this in that earlier mode.  Shiva is depicted as half male, half female.  Thus "he" is Shiva/Shakti, the invisible presence who encompasses all of reality.

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