Sunday, June 20, 2010
Someone has asked me to write on the topic of "catharsis." We know that the awakening of Kundalini can bring into consciousness all sorts of issues and feelings, many related to disturbing events of the past. Sometimes it feels as though we are literally re-experiencing sensations or feeling states from these earlier experiences.
So--what do we do with these deep states of "remembering" that have arisen so strongly and are asking to be dealt with in present time?
To begin, I am not a certified therapist, so what I will say next will be strictly a subjective or intuitive response. But here are some of my thoughts on this subject.
First, let them come through in full force. Don't try to "squash them down" or pretend they are not happening. They are happening and are saying loud and clear, here I am, I linger in your cells, and this is the time to attend. Tibetan Buddhism tells us not to skirt pain, but to enter it fully--feel it, allow it, and move through it. Once that happens, relief may come.
Acknowledge them ("yes, I know, you are still angry; yes, I recognize this as continuing grief"--and so forth). Name them for what they are. That sometimes is in itself enough to lessen their intensity.
But even more important--release your feelings in any way possible--crying is really good, if you can cry. Or screaming or hitting a pillow, if you are dealing with anger and are in a safe environment.
This is a perfect time to seek professional help on these issues. So if you can, see a reliable therapist, one who will give you appropriate techniques to allow these emotions to come through and then find release. If possible, find one who knows about Kundalini as spiritual transformation--stay away from those who see it as an "illness." If you are afraid to tell your therapist about Kundalini (that is, if they are still ignorant of this subject), you don't have to go into the details of this part of your awakening--you can focus on the feelings themselves. Surely they will understand grief, anger, basic feeling states. Don't let them focus entirely on talk therapy--that can be good, but you need to get right down to your gut sensations, your bodily responses--your cellular body wants relief. So find a therapist who combines bodily release techniques with mental exploration.
And by all means, write it out in a personal journal. You can say things there you never told anyone or even said to yourself before. You may be amazed what will come forth. You can, at times, even be more or less your own therapist in this way.
Until these basic issues are pretty much resolved and inner healing occurs, you cannot make the kind of progress you desire on your spiritual path. These are the blockages that can cause "Kundalini pain"--both mental and physical--once they are released, you can make speedy progress, with fewer of the "down" periods of the K. process.
And, if you want to explore other techniques, one that sounds helpful is "EMDR," a method based on eye movements, sound, and tapping. I have no first hand knowledge of this, but a friend tried it and found it a very valuable healing tool. An interesting article on this subject is
I am sure there are many other techniques of use here--I have offered only what occurs to me at this moment. Even certain yoga and meditation teachers might have useful advice. Find what works for you.
And keep in mind that you are dealing with an entire lifetime of struggle and challenge--so be patient for the change to occur.
And always remember--it is not enough to 'know it" mentally--you must experience it at its deepest level and thus experience the actual connections.
But it could be an "a-ha" moment, when you not only see but feel the root cause, and from that time on, everything can change.
And don't give up--I finally discovered my own "root cause" of suffering and self-rejection after years and years of not knowing--and after that, everything changed. I literally became a different person, free at last of the anxiety and self-doubt that had plagued me all my previous life. Kundalini was at last free to weave its full magic, as I gained confidence and discovered (what we all need to know) that we need not depend on others for our sense of self-worth, but can in fact be "our own person," and become who we truly are.
(picture from Prissybev)