Monday, November 14, 2016
Marek Peter Kaziniec
"It can be hard to live a life without the support of groups and state, where ‘we are left, each on his own to follow the star and spirit of his own life.’ And yet this is where life is unfolding, where our destiny is inspiring us to explore and embrace; the new direction of being self-sufficient and unique flowers- spontaneously blooming directly from within ourselves- amongst the borderless flower-field of one mankind."
These words from Mark Kaziniec touch me deeply. When I had my opening in l981, I was totally alone. My life had been completely and instantly transformed. I was indeed seeing with new eyes, feeling connections within in areas which I had not even realized existed. How do you receive extreme rapture into your body when you do not even have a name for it? How do you cope with the many challenges of this strange process, when you have no one to guide you or even to share with you as a sympathetic listener to your amazing story? How do you keep faith when each step ahead is followed by obstacles that you do not comprehend?
I had no guru, no teacher, no companion on this journey. It was so very deeply personal and sacred that I told almost no one about my experience for some fifteen years. I was discouraged when I did finally seek help from so called experts in the field of energy work, receiving such responses as, "If you are lucky, you will get over this," and "No, the texts describe nothing of this sort. The energies can be hot, cold, or like electricity, but not like what you describe."
However, I did have one helper and guide who led me through. This was the presence I thought of as my "inner guru," the teacher who shows us the way, even when no external helper appears.
We each of us have such an "inner guru." To connect with this reality, we must stop, listen, ask for direction in moving forward. We must follow what is often called our own intuition. By doing this, we can thread our way through the maze of the unknown, release our spirit to follow the right course. This secret guru is sometimes named the Friend or the One or the Beloved Within or even our Higher Self or Spirit Guide or the Goddess or even God. It is always with us. It is an essential part of ourselves as we move ahead on our common journey, each in her own unique way.
Sunday morning these words came to me as I walked amidst the beauty of Bobolink Trail: "Today I awoke and came forth from the ashram of my soul. No words can describe, no painting portray what I found. She dropped her veils and revealed her stark autumn beauty, each turning of the path revealing a different face of her loveliness. The winter field swept across to the still green slopes beneath the snow capped ridges above. The golden grasses thrust upward toward the deepening cobalt blue of the sky, where blooming clouds hung as if they were forever stationed there. The stream was still, as if hushed in silent witness to the moment.
I did not try to describe it, but rather drank it in, let it infuse me, become one with the mystery.
For a time I "saw with saints' eyes." I bowed my head in gratitude.